(Note:  The image icon for this page comes from "Prisoner's Voices" at Prison Activist Resource Center.)

the shock of it all

by a family

the judge

“i know you’re a good boy,
you care for your family
in so many ways
this was just a mistake
i know you have learned this
i know you won’t do this again
you have up to this hearing
today”

with the strike of the gavel

“jail, jail,jail…”

the words reverberated as if it was a dream

a very bad dream
part suspended, part to serve
“this is to teach you a lesson,
to rehabilitate you”

with the strike of the gavel
a family was devastated,
no time for a hug, a kiss, a wave goodbye….
no time to figure out
what are we to do

without you for so long

what are we to do

so much racing through our minds

you’ll be alone
you’ll go crazy without your children,
your wife,
your mother,
your siblings….

“jail, jail,jail…”

the click of the handcuffs

roared in our ears
the cries of disbelief
as you were led from our sight
tears streaming from you

and from us

this cannot be, it cannot be

the punishment
was not standard,
did not fit the crime

WHY?

even the victim
requested no jail time

we expected consequences
but not this

WHY?

the shock of the sentence
lingers still

we know it will end, it will end….
life will move on….
but will it end?

the impact of this action
will linger forever

“jail, jail,jail…”

 

the silence is deafening

by me

 

the moment word got out….

“i’m so sorry”

“you must be devastated”

“i’ll be thinking about you”

then

silence

not

“how are you doing?”

“how is he holding up?”

“do you need anything?”

or

“here is my shoulder, go ahead and cry”

 

not one word

all alone

the silence is deafening

 

maybe they don’t know what to do

or say

maybe it’s the stigma

once you have a loved one in jail

you are now contaminated

maybe it’s in the genes

to go to jail

maybe you are jinxed now

so they’ll just stay away so it doesn’t rub off

maybe he is violent

I've assured, though -

it was non-violent,

non-drug related,

first offense....

happened in a panic

due to effects

of societal stresses

and this act was one

that many

have done

and just don’t get caught

no, we, uh, are, uh, busy -

yes, that’s it

don’t call us

we’ll call you

and

have a nice life

dealing with all of this

(glad it’s not me)

previous support for other things

previous invitations

previous communications

all washed away

because i have

a loved one

in jail

these are the sentiments

i hear

in the silence

that is so

deafening

 

like a ton of bricks

by a mom

 

the saying

"hit me like a ton of bricks"

took on new meaning

the day you were sentenced

to jail.

waiting for news from you

after your hearing -

and after a couple of hours,

nothing.

something was wrong....

I could feel it.

then the call;

hit me like a ton of bricks.

your sister, sobbing

"they're taking him to jail

right now....

six months."

crumbling as they hit me

the ton of bricks

shattered my life.

my beautiful, loving son.

i had to break the news

to your wife

your children,

one a newborn.

they were sitting right there

when i got that call;

hit them like a ton of bricks.

expecting you to return

with some consequence,

but not jail -

and not for so long.

the pieces

lay shattered

and are slowly

being swept away

as we wish

for quickly passing time -

though it seems like forever -

until the time

all the pieces

are under the rug.

the impact of that moment

hit us

like a ton

of bricks.

 

aftershock

“i did this

to give you a taste of jail.”

what?!?

this “taste”

of jail

devastated

a family.

obliterated

its stability

even if just

for a “short” time.

no income

no bonding

no second chance.

behind the bars

of justice

you were separated

from all you love.

outside the bars

of justice

we struggled

against injustice

of a system

that only knows

punishment

as

an answer.

the aftershock

is relief

of

getting out

and anguish

of the struggle

that is

to continue.